I’ll never forget that feeling, the first time I had a cock up my arse. That thrilling dull ache that says “You’re being fucked, mate.” That incredible feeling of a rigid presence inside me, performing a taboo act that is almost breathtaking in its perceived sinfulness.
His name was Wesley and he was a private security guard on the Caribbean island of Dominica. I met him through a gay hookup site and he was very polite and respectful. A lot of the local guys were aggressive and seemed to be preying on visitors and expats who wanted to have sex with the available population, which meant mainly black guys, and they had the impression they were god’s gift. I also got the uncomfortable feeling that while I was inside, doing unspeakable things with unsuitable men, his friends would be outside, taking the wheels off my car. That’s nothing to do with the general population, just an impression I got from these cocky, monosyllabic characters.
I can only speak for myself, and yes I like a sexy black man and they do seem to have bigger cocks on average, but as most women will tell you, size isn’t as important as many men think.
I made a date with Wesley to go to his apartment, but I chickened out at the last minute. It’s a small island and everyone knows what everyone else is up to. I was living there and didn’t want to be known as the expat who went there to eat black men.
But all night and the next morning I was consumed with lust for this man. He was tall and muscular, which may be a turn-on for many people but isn’t for me – I like a man-next-door type, not a rippling Adonis. I like to be with somebody a bit rugged, perhaps not in optimal shape, blemished and lived-in. Am I odd? Maybe.
Up to that time I had been a time-waster, fascinated by the idea of having sex with another man but, when it came down to it, unable to relax and give in to my primitive urges. I had sucked a few cocks and then lost interest, made my excuses and left. But even while that climb-down was happening Pendik Escort – or immediately afterwards – I couldn’t help feeling I was robbing myself.
In this case the feeling just wouldn’t go away. Logic told me that this was the right guy and the perfect opportunity and all I needed was a little bit of luck to get in there and out again unseen, like some sexual commando.
The next afternoon I sent him a message apologizing, explaining and asking if we could reschedule for that night. He didn’t reply immediately so at 6 o’clock I went out to a bar for dinner and a couple of glasses of wine. I kept checking the site and eventually there was a message, slightly exasperated and doubting that I would actually do it but asking when. I said “Now” and he said okay.
I drove round there with all fear blocked out and my eyes on the prize.
There was no-one around in the apartment building as I skipped up the stairs.
He greets me at the door. He’s bigger than I imagined, and blacker, which is fine with me. He offers me a glass of wine and I ask if we can take it to the bedroom.
We go upstairs and I lie on the bed like some tart while he has a shower. He’s wandering around naked. He’s very black and very fit and I’m enjoying the sight of his gleaming body and his cock, which is erect already, as is mine.
Finally he gets on the bed and we get together in a side-on 69 and suck each other. He’s got a nice hard cock but it’s not very big, not one of those oversize rubbery ones you see in porn where they have to hold it carefully and manipulate it to get it in a hole because it’s bending all over the place. Wesley’s erection is firm and shiny.
Then he lies on his stomach, because I’ve already told him I want to lick his arse. I can’t help myself: that’s what I love to do and I have to announce that to a guy as soon as we start talking turkey. And I do – I lick this guy’s arse and he loves it. Being so fit and toned and dark, his buttocks are Anadolu Yakası Escort like ebony melons and he has a cute little keyhole tunnel just like a girl’s. I have to part his cheeks to get in there.
If you’ve ever wondered about the “power dynamics” of licking somebody’s arse, it all depends on the receiver. You look at some ass-licking porn and it’s all aggression and unpleasantness.
But if you’re doing it because you like giving it and he likes the feeling of receiving it, it’s a completely civilized transaction. You wouldn’t discuss it with your mother, but you know, it’s just a mutually enjoyed sex act.
Having licked the anus of my new friend, it’s time for penetration and I’m kind of on my side and he smears what is supposed to be lube in my hole (it turns out to be just some hand cream, but it works okay). And he climbs on board and starts fucking me, but the position is not great so I tell him I want to be on my back with my legs in the air, so we do that and it’s much better.
I’m on my back like a girl with my legs wrapped around him as his cock is entering me, which is a very undignified position if you want to look at it like that – but it is also thrillingly, liberatingly abandoned and defenseless, which is how it should be viewed. I’m here to get fucked, so I’m going to unlock the door and invite him in.
He enters me carefully and there is a bit of discomfort, but frankly it’s all a bit of a blur when the pain is accompanied and then overtaken by the thrill. Soon Wesley is bludgeoning my insides and it’s great.
There is a lot to be said for this position, because it’s exciting to be able to see someone fucking you.
Then I want to be mounted doggie-style, because that is the ultimate submissive position in my opinion and, as you may have gathered, this is about submission for me. I don’t want to be abused or insulted, but I am abandoning my traditional male role and allowing another man to put his cock up my İstanbul Escort arse.
And so he gets behind me and squeezes into me again and I love it. It’s that dull ache I mentioned earlier, not around the entrance but deep inside. That may not sound like a great recommendation, a great feeling to have, but considering what is going on it is completely appropriate. It’s not the tearing kind of pain that makes you worried you’re being damaged. It’s more like the slightly sick feeling you get when you’re exercising to your limit and you know it’s doing you good.
Does getting fucked up the arse do you good? Not in itself, maybe, although stimulation of the prostate may have some health benefits – I don’t know.
What I do know is that the feeling of unutterable pleasure that comes with the discomfort – which you soon get used to and convert into a good sensation – fills the brain with endorphins, commonly known as feelgood chemicals.
The submissiveness only works because Wesley is a nice guy who doesn’t push his luck. I trust him. He’s not going to brag to his friends about this old white queen he fucked, because I’m not a queen, just a guy who he had anal sex with. He seems to understand my desire to explore this controversial and still largely secret aspect of male sexuality.
So I’m on my knees with a nice black cock up my arse but I also have a great need to see his spunk, to see it shoot out of his cock and spatter onto my skin. I would like to feel him cum in my crack, but at this early stage of my anal career it is more important to me to see the white stuff erupt like a volcano. Only that will put the whole process spectacularly in my memory.
I lean forward to uncouple from him and quickly tell him what I want.
“I want to see you cum,” I say, unabashed now and able to confide just about anything. “On my chest.”
“Coming right up,” Wesley says, and straddles me. I take his balls gently in my hand to add my little bit of encouragement and in a few seconds he unloads onto me. His spunk is thick and creamy and as it lands in little pools on my ribcage I can smell it, which reinforces the sight and the feeling, which is also very exciting. Pools of hot cum sitting on my skin, deposited there by a man who has just fucked my arse.
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